Foundational Tantric Sexual Practices

Tantric sexual practices are sacred offerings to the alter of our shared Being. They are not solely focused on the excitation of sensational pleasure or the mastery of physical postures. More than that, they are profound portals into the oneness of our hearts. Over centuries of practice, finely tuned methods have been curated with the intention of directly revealing this oneness, in the intimacy of our sexual experience.

With the careful guiding of sexual energy, to permeate the textures of sensation and perception, within the body and throughout the world, this energy can become a vehicle for the visceral recognition of that out of which all experience is made: the one, infinite Substance of Being.

Just as each wave and current is made of the vast body of the ocean, each of the movements of experience, of thinking, imagining, sensing, hearing, tasting, smelling and seeing, is a modulation of the same infinite Substance of Being. When we deeply explore the Substance of our experience, all we find there is Being. And the one who finds only Being is Being itself.

There is only Being, knowing itself as the very Substance to which the word 'I' and 'you' refers. Our true Self - the essence of you and I - is one, infinite Substance, aware of itself, experiencing itself. It is our One Self, our One Being.

On the bed of Tantra we are opened to the felt-understanding of our one, boundless Being. As we soak in the immediacy of our embodied contact, guided by our contemplative spirit, it becomes increasingly palpable that everything is already inseparably merged with everything, that our body and the cosmos are already interpenetrating, passionately inter-coursing.

The illusion of distance dissolves, and our partner’s body is no longer perceived as separate from our own, but as a continuous unfolding of the same living Substance. We experience that we are one Being embodied as the whole cosmos; loving itself, making-love with itself, continuously.

In this way, our sexing reveals a love and fulfilment not dependent on temporal conditions, for we reveal a oneness and completeness always and already present as the essential nature of our infinite Being.

Real, unconditional love and completeness can only be delivered by the infinite, for only the infinite is devoid of separation, lack or incompleteness. No limited form or sensation can create or deliver infinity, love or completeness, just as no wave can create or deliver the ocean. There is only one oceanic infinity here; uncreated, ever-present, as the Substance of all form and sensation.

The intention of Tantra is not to apprehend this truth merely as an intellectual theory, but to experience its evidence in our tenderised fascia, in and through our living, breathing body; to reveal that every articulation of our body is made of one boundless Substance.

This truth becomes experientially evident, during our penetrating practice of Tantra, in the juicy richness of our touch. We feel, with irrefutable clarity, that there is no separation within Being, no distance between itself and itself, no distance between the all and the all. The vast panorama of existence is a vibration of one all-pervasive Substance, the one Substance we are. Our minds are not merely convinced of these words, our whole Being experiences the truth of them directly, in the sighs and moans of our celebration together.

As our Being is inseparably 'one with' itself, it is the utmost experience of intimacy. It is indivisibly itself, never apart from itself, never capable of resisting or rejecting itself. It is itself. As such, our Being is absolute, unconditional love. In the depth of our Tantric sexing, there is a vivid communion of Being with itself, and we recognise our essential, shared Substance as love, beyond emotional tides or conditional patterns. In recognising this, we see that such love cannot be contained as solely emotion or expression; rather it is felt as the very nature of our infinite Substance, shining through all forms. Love is ever-luminous, as all the rhythms and melodies of our sexing, of every nuance of our coming together, and of the totality of existence.

This one Substance of Being affirms its own presence through the recognition 'I am' or 'I love'. The statement 'I am' or 'I love' in its initial arising is pure, infused with the fragrance of its source, unfiltered by conceptual elaboration. It stands as a declaration of absolute love. It comes from absolute love. However, when this statement is later interpreted through the lens of a subject relating to an object, a body meeting another body, the essential Reality of love is no longer seen directly. Instead, love is imagined or believed to exist between two fundamentally separate and independent entities, veiling the non-dual nature of what love truly is. Love is never found in relationship. Rather, love is the dissolution of the concept of 'relationship' in the experience of Oneness. It is the experience that there is only one Lover loving itself as all bodies, and as all phenomena that exist.

Therefore as an intentional attitude in our practice, we suspend this subject-object point of view and treat the entire cosmos as our Self, as the one and only Lover that is; the one Being we all are. Every texture of experience that appears within awareness is then treated with a care, reverence, and sensitivity we offer to the great Lover.

Furthermore, just as we open our body to be penetrated and to penetrate, we open our awareness to be penetrated by all that exists and to penetrate all that exists. This interpenetration of all sensations lays bare the essential truth that all sensation is naturally felt as an intimate caress of the One by the One. As we let go of feelings of separation, and allow those feelings to expand and dissolve into the seamless continuum of Being, we reawaken an innate way of feeling that resides in us already, that of Oneness.

So the invitation for lovers when they unite on the bed of Tantra is not to meet as two separate selves. Instead, it is to open into the possibility that only one Self is truly present; the essential Substance of both. In this mutuality of openness, our sexing unfolds free from the confines of belief or subject-object dynamics. Here, in our innocence, we are open to the revelation that there is only one Beloved, loving itself through both bodies.

To be genuinely open to this Oneness is to enter our sexing as a contemplative and devotional play; to curiously explore the experience of Reality, in its pristine glory. We access an innate state of innocence in us, a state in which we are curious to discover for our Self the abiding truth of our moment to moment experience, without investment in belief or conclusion. If we live from this innocence, the truth of our experience will really have the opportunity to shine forth as it is; unclothed, naked.

Below is a list of foundational tantric practices that any two people can explore together, to deepen this feeling-understanding that all is one body, made of eternal, infinite love:

Consecrating the Space (Setting the Embrace)

Begin by intentionally preparing the space of your love-making. As you move through the space, imbue every gesture with the allurement that you feel for your lover. Feel that the room in which you are situated is the body of your lover, and decorate the space with the energy of your adoration. Erotically charge the space together. You could light candles, burn incense, lay down soft fabrics, play mutually arousing music, and create an altar with objects that are meaningful to you both (e.g. flowers, crystals, sacred symbols). Whatever you do, feel that you are already moving inside your lover's body, and that they are inside your body. Together, you are moving as one seamless flow of sensation, one cosmic body loving on itself. This ritual invites a sense of reverence and attuned presence, and emphasises the Oneness and sacred quality of your union.

Eye Gazing (Seeing Our Self)

Sit facing one another, either cross-legged or in the Yab-Yum position (the woman sitting in the man's lap, heart to heart). Without speaking, gaze softly into each other's eye, either the left eye (the receptive or feminine side) or the right eye (the emissive or masculine side). As you rest into this gaze together, feel that you are seeing only yourself, in all your beauty, appearing as your lover. Feel that the one seeing is the one that is seen. There is only one Being here, seeing itself through these two forms.

Now, within awareness, include the whole field of sensation that comprises your body. Without physically moving the body, imagine and feel those sensations merging with both the visual perception of your lover and the tactile sense of proximity with your lover, as if the sensations of your body are caressing, pressing up against and making love with the beauty you see and feel in front of you.

This intentional act of merging reveals what is already true, and yet deepens the felt-sense of it; that the sensation of the body and the visual perception of your lover are already seamlessly connected. Feel that in their mutual arising, as one continuum of experience, sensation and perception are revealed as expressions of one indivisible Being. Simply invite this recognition into the foreground of your feeling and gazing, and allow the play of allurement and eroticism to guide the flow of sensation together. Continue to remain in silence, deeply communing through the gaze of the eyes and felt-sense of unity.

Pranayama Synchronisation (One Body Breathing)

Begin to breathe in sync. For example, both inhale together for 4 seconds, then exhale together for 4 seconds. Or alternate; one inhales as the other exhales. Continue this for 5 minutes or so, to align your nervous systems, balance energy and attune to each other's rhythm.

As you do this, begin to feel that your breath is initiated within the body of your lover, and likewise, that their breath is initiated within your body. One breath flowing through one cosmic body. Open yourself to this revelation of oneness, as you open to your lover, feeling them as an extension of your body and breath.

Now, as you rest in this intimacy of breathing together, as one, begin to feel the transparency and spaciousness of the air that you breath. Lovingly guide the air to pervade the sensation of your body and the visual perception of your lover, and feel that the very texture of your merging becomes progressively more transparent and spacious. Feel that the Substance of the breath and the Substance of your bodies is one. You are both one spacious Substance of pure sensitivity, caressing itself, within itself, as the air and the gentle undulation of the two bodies. Abide in this feeling-understanding.

As you feel a natural attraction to continue playing with the breath, you can then explore during the inhale the feeling that you are both filled with the fullness of your shared presence, and on the exhale, feel that you spread this fullness into the surrounding space of the room, charging it with your eros and love. Continue this flow of breath, refining the feeling that your shared presence is filling the space.

Now, open and expand your sensations into the surrounding space. Feel them blend with the objects in the room, and allow your sensing of the objects to be as intimate as the knowing of your breath. Feel that the entire landscape is an extension of both bodies, one panorama of Being saturated with erotic, self-loving breath. You are making love with everyone and every thing, playing with the instrument of the breath.

Heart Touch Ritual

Place one hand on your own heart area and one hand on your lover's heart area. Breathe and feel the contact. Notice that the sensation of your hand is thoroughly blended with the chest of your lover, and likewise, the sensation of your chest is thoroughly blended with the hand of your lover. There are not two separate parts to this sensation; hand and chest. Without reference to thought, there is no experiential evidence of separation or distance innate to the sensation. In the nakedness of its fresh arising, the sensation is just one seamless continuum of vibration, neither 'hand' nor 'chest', just one naked, ineffable pulsation. Feel that only one sensation is present, where the imagined 'two', the 'hand' and 'chest', are recognised to always and already be one Substance.

Now, from here, feel each other's heartbeat through the hands, and feel both heartbeats as your own. One cosmic energy animating both heartbeats with the same spark. Feel that spark emanating from your shared Substance. You are giving life to one another, as the source that gives rise to the totality of the cosmos. You give arousal, allurement, pleasure, eros, and love to one another, just by your sheer presence. Marinate in this gratitude of the one source that you both are, the gift you are to one another, and let this gratitude appreciate itself through your whole body, and through the whole space.

Filled with gratitude for one another, as the same self-loving Substance, introduce the feeling that the breath is guiding the flow of this Substance through and between you both. As you exhale, imagine and feel this loving Substance flowing from your heart, through your arm, into your hand and into the chest of your lover. Fill their heart with the loving Substance you are. And, on the inhale, feel this loving Substance pour from their heart, along their arm and into your heart. Revel in the mutual gifting of this loving Substance from itself to itself. Simultaneously receive and give love.

As this cyclical flow continues for sometime, periodically speak a truth, gratitude, or intention for your erotic play together, silently or softly. Such an utterance invites a sense of tenderness and heart-centred orientation before entering more energetically intense states.

Yoni & Lingam Worship (Sacred Honouring)

Before the initiation of penetrative intercourse, offer slow, meditative, non-goal-oriented touch and presence to each other's genitals. Hold, stroke, kiss, massage, and worship your lover's genitals with the highest reverence. With every touch, experience their genitals as your genitals, their pleasure as your pleasure, not figuratively, but actually, for you are the very same Being loving in and through itself. Give the gift of pleasure to your lover, as yourself.

As you give touch to your lover in this way, relax attention into the still depth of your shared presence, into the timeless Substance of sensation, where you are one pulsation of energy. And feel that with every juicy stroke, the movement of your sexing does not arrive at a destination or time apart from the source of the stroke, apart from the ever-present Substance out of which it is made. Feel that there is no goal to the movement of your hand, tongue or mouth, other than the very movement in the moment itself. The climax is already happening as the spontaneous emanation of movement itself.

Rather than feeling the movement is travelling toward an endpoint, feel that the movement is made of Stillness. Stillness moving in Stillness. This Stillness is not dead or inert. It is alive. It is the Substance of Life itself. Each caress is made of alive Stillness, arising from it and subsiding into it, into the eternally alive completeness of Being.

The movement is already complete before it begins, and its completeness never amplifies as a result of the caress. That completeness is experienced as the very Substance of your contact, of your flux of pleasure. However intense the sensation becomes, the completeness of Being remains ever-immeasurable.

As arousal builds, play with varying styles of movement, continuously being aware of the underlying completeness of Stillness, and feel that movement reveals a fundamental Stillness beneath its movement. The dance of time quietly points to the eternally complete Presence which contains its dance. The excitation of pleasure reveals a bliss that never fluctuates in levels of excitement; it is always on, as infinite Being. It doesn't need to be turned on.

Meditative Interpenetrating (Karezza / Valley Orgasm)

Abide together at the opening where penetration begins, and purely rest here, where attraction and sexual gravity become palpably heated. Feel from the immediacy of this skin to skin contact, in perfect stillness, for as long as it takes to attune to the ever-complete Substance of your togetherness.

Now, once you feel the mutual call from within, begin to feel - without viscerally entering and being entered - that you progressively interpenetrate with all of your amplifying sexual energy. Feel your energy and aliveness making love with the energy and aliveness of your lover. Tangibly explore the mixing and blending of your energies, charged with vitality.

A moment comes when the lingam and yoni mutually beckon each other closer, in the silence of sensation or in the groans of naked desire. We feel one invitation to penetrate and be penetrated. Tune-in sensitively with your lover and experience their desire to merge deeper, as you merge deeper. Behold the beauty of this mutually desired union.

As our bodies unify deeper, more closely, we initiate and receive slow, meditative intercourse without the intent to arrive at a state of climactic pleasure or a peak of orgasm. Stay deeply connected, breathing together, moving slowly, and emphasising the seamless Oneness of sensation and presence. There is only one Being moving within itself as the apparent two, one Being ever-loving itself, two bodies made of one cosmic body, ever-intimate with itself.

This slow, steady movement and massaging of yoni and lingam together builds deep energetic and emotional intimacy, and can generate full-body waves of bliss without ejaculation or contraction.

Microcosmic Orbit (Energy Circulation)

During the flow of love-making, visualise and feel sexual energy rising up the spine (from root to crown) and down the front of the body in a loop. Let this not be solely a visualisation of the mind, rather experience it also as an embodied sensing, a felt current of energy awakening the subtle pathways of your psychosomatic system. Feel the progressive refinement of this energy, and its power to charge up the ever-expanding electromagnetic field which pervades your body. As you channel this power of eros and loving through your awareness, touching all that appears within it, notice how the raw pulse of desire, once allowed to rise and circulate, naturally becomes more spacious, more radiant, revealing itself as the very Substance of Being.

Feel the charge building in your own body, and decidedly include your lover's body in the circuit, feeling the circulation of this energy between you both as a loop, or in the shape of an infinity (∞) symbol. Rest in the awareness that there is truly no 'your energy' and 'their energy', but one continuous current expressing itself through two forms. The infinity symbol here is not just an image; it is an invitation to experience yourselves as an unbroken flow, endlessly returning to itself.

This practice transmutes raw sexual energy into higher spiritual and creative energy (ojas) and connects your energetic bodies, through ever-finer layers. As you rest more deeply in this exchange, sense how each layer of connection - physical, emotional, subtle, spiritual - is already saturated with the same indivisible Presence. The practice is not about efforting to ascend; it is the relaxing into the revelation that this refinement is a natural and effortless process, an unfurling of absolute love loving itself in form.

Rhythmic Sounding (Vocalising Together)

During every articulation of intimacy, play with releasing soft sounds or chants together; vowels like "Ah," "Oo," or "Om." Feel that these are not just frivolous utterances, they are primordial vibrations echoing the very hum of existence. Allow sound to come from the genitals, belly, heart area or anywhere attention feels invited to explore, as though each aspect of your cosmic body were longing to give voice to the love it contains. Let the sound emerge without control, as a breath that has always been waiting to sing itself.

Experience the sound as inseparable from the surrounding space, inseparable from the body of your lover. Notice how no boundary can truly be drawn between your voice and the vast silence in which it resounds, or between your vibration and the vibration of your beloved. You are one seamless symphony, inspired by the immensity of your shared eros and love, sounding the truth of your inseparability with every breath and tone. Sing to and from your heart's content, as if the cosmos itself were singing through you, for it is.

This way of releasing sound, in the blissfulness of eros, carrying the blissfulness of eros, liberates blocked energy, opens the throat-heart-genital connection, and intensifies energetic flow. As the voice pours through, tension begins to dissolve, like ice melting into a river of warmth and vitality. Simultaneously, it relaxes the momentum towards ejaculation or depletive orgasms, creating spaciousness for energy to circulate freely and deeply. In this openness, you are invited into a longer marination in sexing, where sensation ripens and refines into ever-subtler states of bliss. Here, in the tactile resonance of sound, body, and awareness, you are drawn again and again to the unmistakable recognition of your infinite Oneness.

Chakra Caressing

Move with reverence through the energetic vortices of your partner’s body, offering your lips, your tongue, your hands, or the silent power of your attention to each chakra centre. Begin at the root, the ground of life-force, and ascend slowly, layer by layer, towards the crown, to the radiant flowering of pure love-awareness as it channels through our bodies. With each kiss, touch, or subtle gaze, you are not solely caressing flesh; you are awakening and opening the luminous aspects of your lover's embodiment, honouring the entire spectrum of existence manifesting in the unique gift of your beloved.

This practice attunes your partner's subtle body to the current of infinite intimacy, where the immense totality of your love becomes particularised as each colour and flavour that the chakras represent. With each caress, there is an invitation for the meeting of sex and spirit, where eros becomes a path into the deepest states of tantric meditation; the felt revelation of love coursing through the body. As the chakras are kissed open, our shared awareness deepens into the felt truth that every sensation is made of an ever-complete unity.

The immovable ground of the root, the sensual creativity of the sacral, the wilful power of the solar plexus, the radiant warmth of the heart, the free expression of the throat, the clarified vision of the third eye, and the infinite expanse of the crown; all are revealed as one seamless topology of your shared Self, experiencing itself through utterly unique instruments of music. In such devotion to one another, as one, where your individuated uniqueness meets your shared identity, lovemaking becomes worship, and every touch whispers the unbroken truth of Oneness shining through the two of you.

Conscious Penetration (Yab-Yum Meditation)

Sit together in the Yab-Yum position: one partner cross-legged, the other resting upon them, legs encircling. This posture is a sacred mandala of Oneness. From within this mandala, mutually beckon a gentle opening into penetrative sex, uniting sensitively and gradually, as though you were returning to a rhythm as old as time.

From here, allow the stillness of Being to guide your movement, and feel all motion rocking within this stillness. Close the eyes or soften them into one another's gaze, allowing sight itself to dissolve into pure presence. Let your breath become shared; an unspoken language carrying you both, a tide that arises from and returns to the same source. In the silence or in the soft groans of effortless flow, feel how your energies meet and mingle, through the unrelenting grace of Being, the Substance irresistibly sharing itself with itself. Rest in the ever-deepening merging that reveals itself when movement arises without force.

In this stillness, surface layers of desire and striving for a goal begin to dissolve, like mist lifting to reveal the open sky. What once appeared as effort unveils itself as ease. Sensations, emotions, and subtle energies flow of their own accord, guided by the innate intelligence of life. In this effortless current, the heart may open, the body may soften, and awareness may expand through your lover, through the surrounding space, until every boundary becomes transparent. Here, sexual intimacy unfolds into all-pervasive intimacy: the felt-recognition that the One you call "yourself" and the One you call "beloved" are revealed as a single pulse of Being, eternally desiring and fulfilling itself in every moment.

Post-Union Practices

Afterglow Embrace (Integration Rest)

After love-making, remain physically close. Lie together in silence, bodies resting in an effortless embrace, limbs entwined or softly touching. Feel the warmth of your shared field, the breath moving as one, the subtle current of energy expanding and softening through both bodies. Let the stillness hold you. Simply rest in the glow of what has been revealed. This silent resting preserves the sacred energy awakened in union and allows it to permeate more deeply. Instead of dispersing, the energy anchors in the heart, in where the intelligence of the body and consciousness guides it to be, where it becomes nourishment for love, intimacy, and spiritual clarity. Here, the afterglow is not an ending, but a ripening; a gentle integration in which two dissolve into the One Substance that was always shining.

Gratitude & Sharing

Before departing from physical closeness or drifting into sleep, turn gently toward one another. Speak a few simple words of gratitude; perhaps for the touch, the presence, or the love that was shared. Or, if words feel too heavy, allow a moment of silent reflection together, letting your eyes or your breath convey what the heart already knows. Expressing gratitude seals the intimacy in the essence of your coming together; absolute love; establishing the energy of the encounter as a current of trust and reverence. When offered openly and sincerely, these words or silent moments weave a deeper bond, reminding both of you that the sacredness of your union is not only in the act itself, but in the recognition of each other as mirrors of the Infinite.

Notes on Attitude and Intention

• Presence Over Performance: Tantric intimacy values deep awareness, not technique. Less focus is on the style of the action, more on the subtler sense of Substance to your union, the Reality of Being.

• No Goal, Just Surrender: Release the expectation of orgasm or climax; these may come, but they are not the purpose.

• Respect Boundaries and Consent: Always honour what feels truly safe, open, and aligned for both partners.

• Have Fun: Sexual intimacy is ultimately a great joy to celebrate, for the sheer pleasure, devotion and closeness possible to experience through our human bodies.

Enjoy.